Emotions have always been a part of human nature. Being able to feel is an instinct, that has its own functions. It is thought to be easy to recognize your emotions and deal with them in the right way, but still we are facing certain problems with this. This is not taught, so we have to look for the information by ourselves.
So what does the meaning of the term “emotional intellect” include?
Being self-conscious means understanding of your feelings. You need to pay attention to the way you think. It also means, that you can clearly understand when you need help and what your limits are.
Money or goods are not the best motivation. What you need to direct you is a feeling why you need to do something, why it can make you happy. You need to enjoy what you are doing, you need to feel useful and appreciated, and this will be a good motivation to continue.
It is an ability to feel and understand another person’s emotions and to know how to react in the right way.
Possessing social skills means possessing a huge power, and you need to use it wisely. Good social skills can give you an intuitive knowledge of how to calm your friend down and make him feel better. It can also be used as a mental tactical weapon – you listen to your friend, you calm your friend down, you use the situation to get what you want. Be careful to use your social skills to be called friendly, but not a manipulator.
It is an ability to control your emotions and not let them take over you. For example, people can try to make you feel sorry for them to get what they want from you. You need to detect this situation and not let yourself be provoked.
What should you do to develop emotional intellect?
Make a pause
Give yourself a moment before you react or reply. This will be enough to think your action over and be sure, that you are doing the right thing.
Take advantage of your emotions
Your emotions can be turned into energy that will make you more productive. We can be angry, if we cannot do something correctly. Instead of letting the anger take over you, you can use it as a source of energy and complete the task with new powers.
Being right is a great feeling, but look at the situation from a different angle. Maybe you are blinded by your own point of view and don’t see, that there is sense in what the other person is saying. Try to listen and understand, why the opposite thought can be correct as well. Why is this person thinking this way? What do they feel? This will both help you to learn to find a compromise and improve your empathic skills.
Decide what you really want
You don’t need to be focused on a common understanding of success and happiness, unless you share it. What you really need is to find your ultimate goal and go for it without being afraid to fail or to be judged.